Why Engineers are Cool

Engineers Think Unlike any Others

Two engineering students while walking across the campus talk. One says to the other, "Where did you get such a great bike?" He replies, "Well I was walking yesterday minding my own business when a beautiful woman rode up on a bike. She threw the bike to the ground, took off all her clothes, and said take what you want."

The second engineer nodded approvingly, "Good choice; the clothes probably wouldn't have fit."

To the optimist the glass in half full.
To the pessimist the glass is half empty.
To the engineer the glass is twice as big as it needs to be.

What is the difference between mechanical engineers and civil engineers?
Mechanical engineers build weapons.
Civil engineers build targets.