Horse

Some Unfortunate True laws of the Nature of Things Page 15

  1. At any particular time, there are more horse's asses in the world than horses.
  2. Possessions increase to fill the space available for their storage.
  3. To say a human being is nothing but molecules and atoms is like saying a Shakespearean play is nothing but words and letters.
  4. There are two kinds of adhesive tape: the one that won't stay on and the one that won't come off.
  5. The one time during the day you lean back and relax is the one time the boss walks by.
  6. The hardness of the butter is in direct proportion to the softness of the roll.
  7. Nature abhors people.
  8. You are always complimented on the item that took the least effort to prepare. Example: If you make roast turkey, you will be complimented on the baked potato.
  9. The length of the marriage is inversely proportional to the cost of the wedding.
  10. If you file it, you'll know where it is but never need it. If you don't file it, you'll need it but never know where it is.
  11. Good times end too quickly. Bad times go on forever.
  12. Random events tend to occur in groups.
  13. No one is listening until you make a mistake.
  14. When the camera focuses on a male athlete he will spit, pick or scratch.
Horse
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