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Some Unfortunate True laws of the Nature of Things Page 18
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If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the
very next morning you will have a flat tire.
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After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch and
you'll have to pee.
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When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, IT WILL!!!
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At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle, always arrive
last. They are the ones who will leave their seats several times to go for
food, beer, or the toilet and who leave early before the end of the performance
or the game is over.
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The folks in the aisle seats come early, never move once,
have long gangly legs or big bellies and stay to the bitter end of the
performance. The aisle people also are very surly folk.
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As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making it,
or the store will stop selling it!
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If you don't feel well, make an appointment to go to the doctor, by the time
you get there you'll feel better. But don't make an appointment, and you'll
stay sick.
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The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of
your act.
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The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.
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The assembly and operation manual will be discarded with the packing material.
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You never know who's right, but you always know who's in charge.
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